Hamma Time

Today I was doing my normal rounds around the various Internet forums when I stumbled upon a thread about Jenna Jameson. Now everyone knows she is one of the biggest and richest porn stars ever, not to mention hot as hell.. or is she. It seems she’s used a majority of that cash to fucking butcher her entire face. It seems now she represents more of an alien than anything else. She’s also apparently reducing her breast size because she feels “Uncomfortable” hello.. you are a fucking porn star. You take off your clothes for a living, on videos, you’ve had sex with thousands of men and you feel Uncomfortable?! Well, fortunately for all of us (I never thought I would say this..) she is leaving the porn industry forever. It appears she wants to focus on some comic, among other bullshit projects.

T minus 2 years until she slits her wrists and joins Owen Wilson!

Hamma Hot Women, Porn, Random Thoughts

Well here we a week and a half later and my car began to spew gasoline all over the place again. This time around I am not taking any bullshit, I’ve dispatched Jen to the scene to monitor the situation. She is sitting next to the shop watching their every move through a window. They claim they are uncertain what the problem is and that it may take all day to fix it. One thing is for sure I ain’t paying a dime to them this time. I think after they raped me for five hundred bucks in labor they don’t need the extra funds for something they fucked up. I’ve got several hundred miles to drive in a few weeks and I need a reiable vehicle to get me there.

Update: Well well well.. looks like the asshat mechanic who worked on it the first time failed to correctly install the Fuel Vent Valve. It’s finally fixed (we hope) and it didn’t cost us a dime for them to resolve their stupid mistake.

Hamma Bullshit, Rants

Some things have changed since my last entry, my relaxing weekend has been long forgotten and to top it off I am $1000 dollars poorer than I was as well. It seems while I was on vacation a mouse (or some other form of vermin, does it matter really) decided to make a home on top of my car’s gas tank. When he started re-arranging the place with his assortment of leaves, soil and rocks he decided the fuel line was in his way and began to chew it away.

As I was driving to work yesterday my car began to scream at me that it was loosing fuel pressure and the gas cap was loose. I get out of the car, cap is tight yet I smell a faint scent of gasoline, I climb on the ground and notice gas spraying out all over the ground and that I had left a trail. The mouse in his passion for home redecorating (he must be a fan of HGTV) managed to destroy my fuel line and pump. So today I spread a box or two of moth balls all around my vehicle, all over my parking space, and even in my garage. Hopefully those fuckers will be long gone, in fact I really hope that some mouse is dying a long painful death from gasoline poisoning the little bastards.

Hamma Bullshit, Rants

Here it is Monday and I have returned back from my relaxing trip to Cape Cod, Massachusetts. Jen and I had a wonderful time and we actually brought my grandparents with us down there to relax as well. It is such a beautiful area and I was able to get some great shots. The one on the right was of Cape Cod light, I made some tiny modifications to it in Photoshop but I think it came out amazing either way. Check out my flickr album to see all the Photos. You will notice a couple fireplace shots in there as well. It was a bit cold and rainy when we arrived so we sparked up the fireplace with all the windows and doors open and relaxed!

One thing I have learned over the years going down to the Cape is that if you are a heterosexual couple walking around the streets of Cape Cod (especially near the tip) you feel extremely out of place. I think there is probably about 90% gay couples living out there, most of them have a pretty good amount of cashflow and drive some sweet cars. I spotted a what I am pretty sure was a Ford GT40 when we were in Provincetown. Sadly I was driving so I could not get any good Pictures of it! Either way a great trip, nothing like a mid summer weekend of relaxation to break things up. Only a month to the DragonWolves Rally 2007!!

Hamma Photography, Random Thoughts

Today I head off for a couple days of much deserved vacation time. Will be taking some pics while I am there hopefully more to add to my flickr album. I’ve been pondering my first hot woman entry for my blog but I have been coming up blank. There’s plenty of hot chicks out there but I don’t want to cheese out and go with someone easy like Jessica Alba. Once I return and have cleansed my mind a bit on vacation perhaps I will have a quality hottie for the first entry.

Don’t break anything while I am gone!

Hamma Random Thoughts

Now since the invention of photography and cameras people have been taking pictures. Many of which have been naked pictures (what better to use this new found technology for!) As it became more practical for the average Joe he began taking pictures as well along came amateur porn among other things. Now here in lies the issue which I will never understand. Women seem to like to take pictures of themselves scantily clad (or nude) in mirrors, or their boyfriends/husbands talk them into it. Men end up in these situations too of course, but not as often. Then again I don’t go looking for compromising photos of men either.

This was not much of an issue back in the day as the photos just sat in an album somewhere or were thrown away and lost forever. You just hoped that someone would not stumble upon them. Fast forward to present day with Digital Photography the Internets (tubes), Youtube, Photobucket, MySpace, Facebook.. the list goes on and on. Now nothing has really changed, women take pictures of themselves in mirrors, boyfriends take pictures of their women all is well. However now with this new dynamic if something goes sour in the relationship (heck even if it doesn’t) these photos can end up on every computer attached to the Internet across the entire planet. Before you know it little Jimmy is in his room doing the nasty with your likeness. Doesn’t sound like a very good proposition now does it?

Now there are entire web sites dedicated to this very thing, someone fucking up and their pictures end up all over the Internet. Anyone could stumble upon them, your mom, your dad, your friends.. hell even your kids. Not that my rant here is going to help anyone not make this mistake but if you do happen to stumble upon this, don’t take compromising pictures of yourself, and don’t let your asshole boyfriend do it either. If it’s digital it will end up on the Internet somehow, some way. If you do do it, I thank you because I’ve probably seen the picture.

* Hamma does not discourage this type of behavior, keep it up!

Hamma Random Thoughts

This past weekend Jen and I decided to go out and see the Simpson’s Movie (The movie wasn’t that great btw just wait for the DVD). Whenever we go to the theater Jen has to listen to me complain about whatever is going on there at a time, hey it’s part of marriage isn’t it? Sometimes it’s some asshole who feels the need to carry on a conversation during a movie. Other times its the shitty seats or crappy floor.. gotta love that sticky floor. This time she got to listen to me complain about what else but the commercials that they make you see during the start of a movie.

Now I don’t have a problem dealing with the trailers really as they can sometimes be pretty entertaining. What I just cannot deal with is the fucking commercials they make you see. First off I am paying like $7.50 to come in and view a movie. I am not paying that money to come in and watch commercials which I can do for free at home. I am stuck there and cannot do anything so I am a captive audience which obviously is exactly what the asshats want.

Here is how it should work. The movies should start at the showtime so if my showtime is at 12:30 when I walk in at 12:25 I should only be 5 minutes from watching the movie, the trailers should be playing and I should have a seat. At 12:30 the movie starts and I happily watch the flick then leave. In reality what happens is you sit down at 12:25 and watch a shitload of commercials, then at showtime I sit through another 15 minutes of trailers and other misc bullshit they feel they should throw in the mix. Why must they do this? Isn’t it false advertising to put up a showtime that’s false? I mean.. the movie isn’t showing at the time they say it is, I think it might be time for me to sue due to emotional distress.

Hamma Rants

DEFCON 2007 is underway this weekend in Las Vegas, NV a perfect opportunity for Dateline NBC to try and up its undercover reporting series, unfortunately for them this time they were the ones who were uncovered. Dateline reporter Michelle Madigan was revealed as she was hiding in the audience among other hackers and DEFCON staff announced a game called “Spot the undercover reporter” turns out, they really knew who she was all along.

Too bad. They knew when her plane took off. They knew when her plane landed. They knew when she picked up her non-press attendee pass (human in the vernacular). They followed her around. They knew when she walked into the ladies room to wire up, camera and sound. She knew that the camera was not allowed but did it anyway, and told a goon that she was doing so.
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Oopsie.. looks like when you are attempting to pull off an operation like this you should make sure you aren’t dealing with people smarter than you. Their tactics may work against dumbass criminals and pedophiles but it isn’t going to work when you are dealing with a smarter crowd, as she found out the hard way. She was chased out the door by around 150 DEFCON attendees who were shouting questions at her as she made her way to the exit, she promptly entered her car hidden camera and all and tried to go out the wrong way.. having to back up again and be harassed by the contingency following her.

Looks like Dateline wasted some cash on that run and they won’t be getting their “Story” after all. I’m sure Joe-Bob somewhere in America would have been appalled at what the “Hackers” were up to. But when push comes to shove most of these guys do nothing illegal and actually help companies to resolve security holes before they get out into the general public. Recent iPhone flaws that were discovered were patched up in short order by Apple among countless other situations where hackers have helped keep the average oblivious computer user safe.

Hey at least they sent a semi hot reporter! So here’s to Dateline for getting owned I wonder if Chris Hansen was going to be involved in this story? Check out more coverage on Google News and also the Youtube video of the chase..

Update: Wired Threat Level has a ton more information and photos here.

Hamma Rants, Technology